Combat the Law of Familiarity

Do you know what the “law of familiarity” is?

Each of us should not only know what it is but, more importantly, know how to combat it since it applies to everyone.

The law of familiarity simply states that if you are around something long enough, you tend to take it for granted and therefore pay less attention to it. (Click on image below if you prefer to watch a video rather than read.)

When applied to people, it's the tendency we all have to give less value towards, and therefore apply less focused attention to, the people speaking that are very familiar to us, whom we can hear from often.

Who does this law of familiarity apply to? Some more than others, but essentially every one of us!

Entrepreneurs leading teams, pastors leading churches, those leading volunteers, managers leading teams, mothers and fathers leading children, and more.

Think about this for a moment…

Have you ever had someone, maybe a team member, employee, spouse or child, hear something from someone else that you’ve previously shared with them (likely multiple times before) who finally hears the same thing from another person and shares it with you as something they excitedly just heard for the first time?

I’m sure we all have, and I’m equally confident we have each done the same to someone else.

Whenever this happens, don’t let it hurt your feelings, make you feel inadequate, and don’t believe that the person doesn't care about what you have to say. It’s like just the law of familiarity and the best of the best leaders deal with this too.

Hey, even Jesus dealt with this law of familiarity, well over 2,000 years ago!

Most people in his hometown of Nazareth wouldn’t listen to him and thought he was talking crazy. They’d known him since he was a kid. They were familiar with him as Joseph and Mary’s son.

But when he traveled 14 miles away to Capernaum, delivering the same messages, people there listened to him and many believed him, even saying he was the son of God!

I’ve certainly experienced this law in action. It’s interesting. People are willing to pay me large sums of money to get my time and hear what I have to say, but my own children or members of the team I lead at times won’t hear me.

And it’s not always their fault.

When people hear the same person too much, the law of familiarity can kick in, causing others to tune them out so to speak. This law is real!

So, what can we do about this? In addition to what you share, incorporate the use of others to teach and train those you want to lead.

Choose the book, the speaker, the podcast, the message, etc., that you want them to hear.

By allowing another to deliver the message, we are creating an environment for them to more easily hear the things we believe would benefit them.

We must put our pride aside and allow another to be the “expert” at times, sharing in essence the same messages we would have shared.

They may deliver it better or worse than we would have done, but that’s not the point. The point is that it’s a new, fresh voice that is oftentimes easier for them to hear.

It’s that simple.

Think about how this strategy can be applied to your life, to combat the law of familiarity and to benefit those you lead, then apply it!

Until next time,